Being Sick Doesn't Have To Be Bad
by Alexis Dawn
Summary: My take on the apartment scene in the episode "Perverted".


**Pairing: **Elliot Stabler & Olivia Benson**  
Summary: **My take on the apartment scene in the episode "Perverted".**  
Warnings: **Spoilers for the episode "Perverted".  
**Disclaimer: **I don't own the characters or the show.**  
Notes: **This begins with the apartment scene and then it spins off into my own take of it. I apologize if some of the apartment scene is wrong but I did say some of this is my own spin on it. Give me honest feedback, constructive criticism is welcome.

* * *

She hears the door bell ringing in the distance, wondering who it could possibly be. Sniffling she puts the box of tissues she had on her lap down, making her way slowly to the door. She looks through the peep hole, seeing her partner of 12 years on the other side, wondering why he isn't with his family like he should be. She opens the door and Elliot just takes a look at her, his face automatically showing concern.

"You look horrible." He quipped walking in as she closed the door behind him.

"Enough with the sweet talk." She quipped back, her eyebrows rising indicating she won that short teasing match.

"How's the case going so far?" Olivia asked as she lies down on the couch, Elliot hovering over her watching with concern.

"It could be better." He replies taking the blanket off the back of the couch, putting it around her. He leans over putting the back of his hand against her forehead, concerned when he feels the heat automatically radiating off of it.

"You're burning up." He says watching her push down the blanket, opening some case files. He turns around heading towards the kitchen, opening one of the cabinets above the sink.

"What are you doing?" She says curiously wondering what he's doing in the other room.

"I'm making you some tea." He says taking the cup out of the cabinet, warming up the teapot. He walks over to the fridge opening it looking for something for her to eat. "Do you ever go shopping?" He comments looking at the fridge, containing a few beer bottles and some bottles of water.

"Well I heard delivery is the new thing." She says wiping her nose, looking at him moving stuff around by her toaster.

"Why are there brochures for a vacation over here, Liv?" El asks, praying she's not trying to run from him again.

"A girl can dream. Stop snooping around." Liv says flipping through the files on her lap.

El hears the teapot whistling, so he goes over to the stove turns it off and pours the warm tea into a mug for her. He goes over to her, takes the files from her lap putting them on the table and giving her the mug. "Drink this and relax." He simply says walking to her bathroom to get some Tylenol from her medicine cabinet.

"I have to work El, you know that." She exclaims reaching for the files just as he comes back out with the medicine.

"Your sick, work can wait. Take two of these every 8 hours, they will help with the fever and any pains you may have." He says giving her the pills and grabbing the files to put them in the other room.

"If I take them can I have the files back?" Olivia says hoping to persuade him into letting her do some work.

"Not a chance. Now take the pills, drink your tea and relax." He says walking back into the room sitting on one of the chairs by the couch.

"When did you start feeling sick?" Elliot asks wondering how long she's been feeling this bad.

"I think late Saturday night, I started getting sick." Olivia asks, taking her medicine, turning to face him.

"Liv! It's Wednesday already!" He exclaims, wondering how he didn't notice this till today that she wasn't herself.

"I know, but it didn't start kicking in till this morning, then Cragen decided to send me home. I'd rather be at work trying to solve this damn case." She says wishing she was at work but glad he's there taking care of her instead of John or Fin.

"Alright, just get some rest. Is it okay if I turn the TV on?" El asks, not wanting to disturb her but not knowing what else to do around her house.

"Yeah, I was going to go lay down in my bed any way. It's much comfier then this couch." She says starting to sit up slowly.

"Oh, okay. Here I'll help you to your room." El says standing up and offering her his arm, hoping she wasn't mad at him.

"It's okay El. I am a big girl, I don't need help, and I'm perfectly fine getting to the bedroom by myself." Olivia said knowing it would be kind of awkward for them to be alone in her room. She has had dreams about it before, under different circumstances of course. She knows it wouldn't be right, no matter how good she's sure it would feel.

"Liv, stop being stubborn and just accept the help. It's just us going to your bedroom like usual." Elliot said, realizing how bad that sounded after he said it.

"Like usual? Since when do you go into my room?" Olivia asked with raised eyebrows starting to stand from the couch.

"_Every night, in my dreams._" Elliot mumbled praying Liv wouldn't hear it, unfortunately for him she did.

"Well guess what El, in your dreams is about as far as your going to get, as long as you're married." She said getting up from the couch and starting to walk to her bedroom with a smirk on her face. She wished he wasn't married, but even if he wasn't, Cragen would have a fit if he knew his two top detectives were together.

"Well, actually Kathy filed for divorce Sunday. She said I wasn't home enough and I never paid attention to her." Elliot said starting to walk to Liv's room, almost bumping into her as she turned around and stared at him in disbelief.

"She what? You did what you were doing to keep her and your children safe. Can't you try to fix it?" Olivia said still shocked at what her partner just told her. She would never understand why Kathy would give up a great man like Elliot.

"Honestly, I don't want to fix it. It has been over for years. Going back to her that one night, it was a mistake. I don't regret Eli but I do regret that he wasn't made in love but just a comfort thing. I'll always love Kathy as the mother of my children, but I fell out of love with her years ago." Elliot says looking straight into Olivia's eyes wondering where this conversation will lead them.

"I am so sorry to hear that El. Have you told the kids?" Olivia said concerned about her partner and his kids.

"Yeah, they said they were kind of waiting for it. Maureen said with the fighting and how we acted she knew something was up. Kathy's going to keep the kids, but they are able to visit my place anytime, once I get a place that is." Elliot said feeling angry that his marriage split up after 22 years and concerned for how the kids are really taking it.

"Well if you need to talk, you know I'm here El. Out of curiosity, how many years exactly has it been since you fell out of love with her." Olivia said curious to know exactly how long he has been in a loveless marriage.

"Too many." He says, hoping she doesn't push the topic. He's afraid of what she will say if she finds out the truth.

"How many years is too many El?" Olivia asks with a bit of hope, wondering how many years it has been. She sees him looking from his shoes to her face, anger, sadness and love etched in his face.

"12 years ago, Olivia. I fell out of love with Kathy, 12 years ago. 12 years ago, you walked through those doors and made me fall in love with you. 12 years, Liv, 12 fucking years ago I realized she could never compare to you. No one could ever compare to you, Liv." He said his voice rising with every word, mixed with anger and love in his voice. "You should go to bed. I'll be back in the morning to see how you are doing." Elliot said realizing what he just said, seeing Olivia with shock clearly on her face.

"El, I...I..." She said stuttering, shocked about what he said. She knows she has been in love with him for the same amount of time.

"Just go to bed Liv, feel better." El said turning around walking towards the door. He can't help but wonder what will happen, now that his feelings for her are out in the open.

'_El, wait. I love you to._' She wanted to yell out, but couldn't. She just fell to the floor sobbing as she heard Elliot slam the door shut.

_**Two hours later.**_

She lay still on the floor, dried tears on her face. Taking her hands away from her face she realized just how long she had been laying there. Getting up she went to her room to get into bed for then night. Seeing the time **1:12 AM** on her alarm clock she went into the bed, set the alarm and thought about the events that occurred a few hours ago.

'_I'll talk to him in the morning. I need to tell him how I feel, it has been to damn long living like this. He needs to know I feel the same, before anything bad happens._' She thought, finally falling asleep, thoughts swirling in her head about the conversation she needs to have with her partner in the morning.


End file.
